Jon worked hard his whole life. Study, study, study. His
friends have good jobs with hot wives so Jon decides he should too. His friends
have kids so he and hot wife have one too. They call her Lulu. Jon reports to
CEO tomorrow. Lulu throws up on report. Jon loses job. Silly Lulu.
Martha takes Bill, her blind friend for a seeing eye dog.
She sees a dog next to a sign: “BLIND.” “Ah, here we are Bill – this will do
just fine.” Bill and dog walk out of pet shop, down the street. Chaos ensues.
If they avoid getting crushed by a car they will be best of friends.
Life can’t be easy. If it were, everyone would do it. One of
life’s hurdles is the challenge of social interaction. Communication is hard
and it only becomes harder when you fart. This is the importance of being
lactose intolerant. It challenges you to be social even when things get
turbulent down there.
What do you, yes, YOU do in the elevator? No, not when
you’re all by your lonesome, but when a man with onerous body odor accompanies
you. Do you hold your breath? Do you dare sneeze? Will you hold in the sneeze
so as not to breath in is fumes? Yes, you probably will; and I, will be
laughing at you from the security camera placed discreetly on the upper right
panel.
Jack and wife eat slimy burger in Moscow airpoirt. Jack was
bad and must make up for it. Walks towards bar. Chinese woman intercepts him,
hands him her baby. “Stay here.” But he
can’t; he must use bathroom. Wife and Chinese woman are worried: where is Jack?
He returns for his wife with a drink: Pepto Bismol.
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